officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize