We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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