Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize