FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
