2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Life is so much better after having sex.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Randomize
