they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize