Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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