oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Randomize