is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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