i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Randomize
