My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
