the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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