She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
i think i have herpe
just one?
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
this boner is exhausting
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
