OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
