Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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