Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
