Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
