i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Randomize
