Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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