With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize