can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
