So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize
