His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
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