you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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