Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
So much rum. So many feels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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