The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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