tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize