If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize