Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
