Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
