We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
