My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Randomize
