Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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