pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
