I'm going to jail i love you
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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