i think i have herpe
just one?
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
we're making bets on your personal life
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Randomize
