ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
