Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Randomize
