Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
