420 ftw
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
