i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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