Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
It happened again.
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??