Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny