i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
