i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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