I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize
