I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Randomize
