Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
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