5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
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She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
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It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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