Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
