Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
