yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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