I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
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